"For Fatso" Underwear and Other Unfortunate Translations...

I'm writing this to convey the elegance of the Chinese language... Living here gives me a a new appreciation for the challenges translating culture. There is such sweetness in Chinese -- when you meet an older woman, you call her "older sister". You say your verbs twice to soften the language (in the sentence, I would like to look at your store...the verb - look (kan) becomes kan kan.)

And just think of all the Chinese nonsense characters young people are having tattooed on to them in the US! I would never disparage these translations in a mean way.

But still -- For Fatso underwear? Patrice and I found this when shopping for John ... the poor guy lost his luggage -- and most of his clothes -- on a trip to Indonesia. For Fatso is how extra large is translated on the package. And instead of large, the box was marked XXXXXL (5 XL) and the shorts were still too tight!

Other phrases that make me smile:

Deformed man toilet -- Handicapped bathroom

Don't forget to carry your thing -- huh?

Your careful step keeps tiny grass invariably green -- keep off the grass

Wash after relief -- sign in bathroom. Enough said

Chinese Daughter

It's impossible to describe our world in China. Because of the language challenges, it is is opaque. There's so much to get done...but it's nearly impossible without Chinese language skills. Getting the computer hooked up. Finding a tailor. Understanding the grocery store.


So that's why I found Lily.


There's a terrific web site for expats in China called The Beijinger. All in English. In the classified ads, there are a lot of tour guides offering their services in Beijing -- but the photos of these girls looked like glamour shots with come hither looks. I wasn't sure what they were offering...


Then I saw Lily's ad. This cute little Chinese girl -- a certified tour guide -- with perfect English. And now my world has changed.


Lily is charming...26 years old and engaged to be married. She laughs a lot and like most Chinese people, works very hard. She's helped me communicate with Yan Shifu, Wang Ping, our new Ayi (maid), order water, find a laundry, get tailoring done, shop and translate.


When Lily's not working, she studies English vocabulary. The first day we met, she asked me to explain the difference between aggravate and deteriorate. And she wanted a better definition of exacerbate ...


While out one day, I helped Lily try Italian food for the first time -- and she loved it!


What did I do without her?


Yan Shifu loves Lily, too...he calls her my "4th daughter"!

Mrs. Drinks Beer and Eats Potato Chips

So what is the world of a driver in China like? We thought Yan Shifu was a quiet fellow -- but I now realize he was waiting for his true calling...teacher (Laushi). My lessons begin the minute I hop in the car!


Because Yan Shifu is so smart, he's able to translate my grunts and mumbles into an actual language. He translates for my friend Lily when I try to speak Mandarin! Yan Shifu and I have long conversations...only possible because he's filling in the gaps of my language....and has developed "Berlitz ears" (which also allow my Berlitz teachers to understand me...)


He understands more English than we know. After we dropped my friend Patrice at the airport, Yan Shifu asked me if she was talking to her husband on the phone. Then he said, "kiss, kiss... I love you! I love you!" in English! Just like she did say on the phone.


And how does Yan Shifu see me? He solemnly told Lily, "Mrs. drinks beer and eats potato chips." He helped me shop for a party. But after I thought about it, I realized he was right! I adore Chinese beer (Yanching!)...and potato chips.


He worries because I don't cook -- and asked me immediately if Patrice cooked for her family...he's afraid I'm an example of all US women.


Yan Shifu also gave me one of the greatest compliments I've ever received when he told Lily, "Mrs. is highly educated -- that's why she's learning Chinese so quickly." It simply took my breath away, I was so grateful...I still have so far to go.


Because John is working so hard, Yan Shifu and I spend a lot of time together. My Chinese language teacher!